Tonight I have been asked to do the Bible Study. I will be covering some first through 3rd or 4th century Church history. As I mentioned before, the students have almost no familiarity with Western history, so the context of the New Tesament is lost on them. I have brought my aerial DVD's of Israel from Preserving Bible Times (the masters of Biblical context, check them out at http://www.preservingbibletimes.org/ , and sign up for Doug's reflections- good stuff.)
Bonus jokes from Emo Phillips (don't know anything about him, just that the first quote was in my Brain book, so I looked up some more).
I used to think that my brain was my most important organ. But then I thought- wait a minute- who’s telling me that?
(Here's one for you COG folks)
I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said "Stop! don't do it!" "Why shouldn't I?" he said. I said, "Well, there's so much to live for!" He said, "Like what?" I said, "Well...are you religious or atheist?" He said, "Religious." I said, "Me too! Are you christian or buddhist?" He said, "Christian." I said, "Me too! Are you catholic or protestant?" He said, "Protestant." I said, "Me too! Are you episcopalian or baptist?" He said, "Baptist!" I said,"Wow! Me too! Are you baptist church of god or baptist church of the lord?" He said, "Baptist church of god!" I said, "Me too! Are you original baptist church of god, or are you reformed baptist church of god?" He said,"Reformed Baptist church of god!" I said, "Me too! Are you reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1879, or reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1915?" He said, "Reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1915!" I said, "Die, heretic scum", and pushed him off.
This one is great...
I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well.
People come up to me and say, "Emo, do people really come up to you?"
I went into Gus's artificial organ and taco stand. I said "Give me a bladder por favor." The guy said "Is that to go?" I said, "Well what else would I want it for?"
For Tarah D and Chris B:
I was in a bar the other night, hopping from barstool to barstool, trying to get lucky---but there wasn't any gum under any of them.
The other day a woman came up to me and said, "Didn't I see you on television?" I said, "I don't know. You can't see out the other way."
One more while I am at it...Certainly made up (saw it as part of someone's signature on an expat blog here in Thailand):
I think it is down in the basement. I'll go upstairs and check. - M C Escher
I went into Gus's artificial organ and taco stand. I said "Give me a bladder por favor." The guy said "Is that to go?" I said, "Well what else would I want it for?"
For Tarah D and Chris B:
I was in a bar the other night, hopping from barstool to barstool, trying to get lucky---but there wasn't any gum under any of them.
The other day a woman came up to me and said, "Didn't I see you on television?" I said, "I don't know. You can't see out the other way."
One more while I am at it...Certainly made up (saw it as part of someone's signature on an expat blog here in Thailand):
I think it is down in the basement. I'll go upstairs and check. - M C Escher
Hey Brian - seems all is well is Thailnd - it's one of our favorite places. Hope to get back there.
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For the record - I haven't been on an ABC gum hunt since Y.E.S. I can't speak for Chrissy!
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